Bill your doctor for time spent in his waiting room.
Braid the hairs in each nostril.
Buy a box of condoms. Ask the cashier where the fitting rooms are, and ask for help.
Buy a subscription to "Sleazoid Weekly" and send it to your boss's wife.
Dance naked in front of your pets.
Do your computer programming assignments in binary code.
Drive to work in reverse.
During your next meeting, sneeze and then loudly suck the mucous back down your throat.
Fill out your tax form using Roman Numerals.
Find out what a frog in a blender really looks like.
Forget the Diet Centre and send yourself a candy gram.
Go shopping. Buy everything. Sweat in it. Return it the next day.
Jam miniature marshmallows up your nose and sneeze them out. See how many you can do at a time.
Leaf through "National Geographic" and draw underwear on the natives.
Lie on your back eating celery; using your navel as a salt dipper.
Make a list of things to do that you have already done.
Make up a language and ask people for directions in it.
Pay your electric bill in pennies.
Polish your car with earwax.
Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on.
Put your toddler's clothes on backwards and send him to pre-school as if nothing is wrong.
Read the dictionary backwards and look for subliminal messages.
Read the dictionary upside down and look for secret messages.
Refresh yourself, put your tongue on a cold steel guardrail.
Relax by mentally reflecting on your favourite episode of The Flinstones during that important finance meeting.
Replace the filling of a Twinkie with ketchup and put it back in the wrapper.
Retaliate for tax woes by filling out your tax forms with Roman numerals.
Sit naked on a shelled hard-boiled egg.
Stare at people through the tines of a fork and pretend they're in jail.
Start a nasty rumour and see if you recognize it when it comes back to you.
Tape pictures of your boss on watermelons and launch them from high places.
Tattoo "Out to Lunch" on your forehead.
Tell you boss to "blow it out your mule" and let him figure it out.
Use your MasterCard to pay your Visa bill and vice-versa.
When someone says "have a nice day", tell them you have other plans.
Write a short story using alphabet soup.