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Caught@Work Productions
Waste some time
Have a donut and some coffee
While you are supposed to be working

Things I've Learned The Hard Way

When you are used to driving a small car (i.e. a Toyota Corolla) and you get given a nice, shiny, new, large car (i.e. Holden Commodore VT Series II) from work and you have a narrow driveway with a mailbox at the end and a smallish garage, don't assume that you can just back out of the garage, down the driveway without looking.
B

When you go to the doctor and he says things like 'I've never seen one quite like that before' or 'Hmmm, I don't believe it should be that color', but then follows up with 'But don't worry, I'm sure it will be alright', go and get a second opinion.
A

When you have a pair of jeans, that are your favorite and have been for many, many moons, do not wear them out on a date (especially if you have put on a little bit of girth, but your jeans haven't) and expect them to hold up under pressure. They won't.
B

When you are 6 foot tall, the washing line is set around 5 foot 11 inches from the ground and there are times when the wind blows and the washing line spins around, do not assume that you can avoid the problem by ducking underneath the sucker. 6 stitches in my head prove that you either need to lose two inches off your height, or wind the washing line up another inch to so.
C

Toast never looks hot.
A

When the wife calls upon you to have a look at the reason why the drain in the shower is not letting water out as fast as it should, you should never take a steel coat hanger and poke around in the hole, to see what you can get out. Most of the time it will be water, water, and more freaking water.
B

When you have taken the steel coat hanger to the drain and ended up with a bathroom so full of water Moby Dick could get around in there without a problem and then you call the plumber, the plumber will not believe you when you tell him 'I found it this way'.
A

When you get 25 cent soft drinks from Coles because the cans have been dented, make sure when you open the can, there is a nice fitzzzzzzzzz sound. If not, check for a hole around the dent. A mouth full of orange mould is not fun.
B

When you are lopping the branches off a huge apple tree in your parents backyard and they make comment about how they think that branch is going to hit the washing line, and you tell them, no it's OK, I've nicked the branch so that it will fall that way, watch out for gravity. She can be a harsh task master and all nicking in the world ain't gonna stop that sucker from falling straight down.
C

If you run out of specialty dishwasher detergent, do not under and circumstances use regular detergent. The bubbles just keep on coming on, and on, and on. The plumber will also disbelieve your offers of 'It was like that where I got here'.
B

And the final lesson I learnt the hard way, even though it may cause an awful clutter around your house ... Keep the receipt.
A
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