Never piss into the wind.
Actually, you probably already knew this, so I'm not necessarily being elevated to godlike status now am I. Oh, and if you're a woman and have no idea what I'm talking about, ask your boyfriend or husband. They'll explain, probably in too much detail.
When you're boiling skulls, add some garlic cloves. It does wonders for the smell.
'Strap on' (as in the rather large rubber thingies that certain ladies like to ... er, um, insert) spelled backwards is 'No Parts' and that's just funny!
To the boyfriends and husband who are now reading this (as a result of you being asked why you shouldn't piss into the wind), do not put dishwashing soap meant for hand-dishwashing into an automatic dishwasher. You will end up with more suds than a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
Despite your long search, most haystacks do not have a needle.
Now that you and your boyfriend are sitting comfortably in front of your computer, you should know that if you right click on the scroll bar and you get a menu to:
Rub your finger in the cleft behind your ear -- now smell it.
Does it smell like parmesan cheese? If so chances are you are one of the 85-93% of the population who host some strain of Penicillium roqueforti. A harmless bacteria responsible for the veins in bleu cheese and that distinctive taste of parmesan. It is harmless and is actually thought to inhibit itchy yeast infections.
And by the way, I can't believe you just took a sniff at your ear rubbings. Gross!